Thirty-eight weeks - The waiting game ...

Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Here I am over thirty-eight weeks now! A mere two months ago I wouldn't have placed any bets we would see this number. From the time I was deemed a high risk pregnancy and the cerclage was placed we kept beating the odds and gained weeks like a normal pregnancy. It was everything I prayed for! This is where the mixed feelings and confusion has hit me lately. At thirty-six plus weeks I was scheduled for my cerclage removal and was told it will be go time within the week. The doctors I had feel a "rescue" stitch holding baby in differs from a preventive one. Well... here I am typing this blog post with baby girl tucked cozy inside still. My thoughts and feelings are a mess lately. I know should be jumping for joy that she won't be an early arrival anymore but I'm not. I have transitioned into the normal pregnancy thoughts of wanting to hold my sweet baby. As I share my excitement to get labour going and when I am honest to saying I want her NOW! I know what is crossing many people's minds and some have said it out loud "But you were just praying for her to stay??" and they are right, I was praying for her to stay as long as possible. However, this doesn't mean at the end of my pregnancy journey I can't feel like others.

 I personally have had one of the biggest years of change and hiccups ever! In all honesty I feel tired and often like I'm stuck in a dream. My family has been scattered around, I've been stuck in the tiny rental condo with a rambunctious four year old for four months now, I've had the adjustment to not working this year, ups and downs of pregnancy issues and I'm just ready to wake up and start living normally. I used to cook amazing meals, craft, sew, redecorate our home, host guests, and work full time. I was always busy and loved it! I am ready to have baby girl and go home to our actual house and have my normal life back. (Or as close to what we had, since I gave up working and our move, hubs work, house, life is all new.) Every day is Groundhog Day lately. I wake up, tend to King, go for long walks and wait for the so called labour that was supposed to start. The only difference is the amount of rain Vancouver is pouring down on us that morning. This isn't my home or my city and my chipper "make the best of it" is running out. I have a journey ahead that includes flying with a newborn myself, organizing the balance of our items to be transported to California and the biggest desire to have my family in one solid home that requires no more plane trips between us. I will continue to do my best for everyone around; but when I wake up and shed a tear in the morning because Groundhog Day is on repeat and I'm desperately ready to write that next chapter, I hope you understand that if you prayed or sent positive thoughts to keep Apple in, I'm still so very thankful. And truthfully for the most part I'm savouring the kicks, wiggles and beautiful belly I've enjoyed. I promise I'm really not complaining .... Much.

So this post comes down to the fact parenting and pregnancy isn't easy, there are good days and bad days. We never know what that mommy is keeping inside. Maybe your friend, coworker or family member is going through more than they want to tell you. Their aches may be real, sleepless nights uncomfortable and current situation harder than you know. Before we judge or tell them pregnancy is beautiful and they shouldn't want it to end, or to suck it up when they are overwhelmed with baby duties step back and consider there could be something more going on.


The waiting game with my Nespresso 

Nursing set by You! Lingerie

Nursing/Maternity Bra by Bravado Designs


Safe sleep and the Owlet Monitor

Tuesday, December 8, 2015

I would like to address safe sleep and peace of mind for a new baby in the house. This is something close to my heart. 

Many years ago, seventeen to be exact, I had my beautiful first born son. He was incredibly easy and peaceful. Within weeks of being born he started to sleep long stints almost through the night. I had read many books on parenting and practiced most of the recommendations to reduce SIDS. (Many of these have advanced over my time of being a mom.) One afternoon...yes, an afternoon... I placed my easy going little angel for a nap at my mothers house. Not worrying too much but still having the mother instinct I had him properly on his back and walked away. As time passed something told me to go check up on him and it was then when I was walking toward him, I saw his colour was not right. He was a shade of gray. I remember this moment so vividly yet it was such a blur of emergency. I as a young mother found my child almost lifeless! I picked up Braedy screaming and running upstairs to where my mother was, all the while shaking him to please breathe. I felt like my life was over at that moment and even today typing this story it makes me cry with the fear of losing a child. By the time I had made it upstairs he was starting to breathe normally and started to cry. We had called in to the hospital and he was admitted for monitoring, brain scans, and sleep tests...I was also counseled in how to deal with this situation. We went over all I could do to best prevent situations and how to live normal but my normal wasn't anywhere near normal again. After a few days we learned that he had infant sleep apnea. He would go into very shallow breathing and have long pauses. After being released from the hospital he slept by my side in his bassinet and for more than half the night on my chest because I couldn't fall asleep. There were more scary moments that came when he was too peaceful and the sounds would stop. I would wake out of my barely there sleep and scream to my then husband he's not breathing again! Lamps would be knocked off in panic to get the lights on, heads would be banged, and fear would stay close. It was the longest first year of motherhood.

By the time I had my second child a new invention came out called the Angel Care monitor. This was a purchase I made right away hoping it would help get me through the first year. It did not work well for us at all! It would false alarm or not work and it became a bother. I eventually co-slept with a mix of baby beside my bed or beside me. We managed much better since this baby was my hardest... my feistiest son was a cryer! Like aaaallllll night crying! He had no time to fall into a deep sleep like his brother. Eventually, years later Mr. King came along and my shattered nerves had healed a bit more. I made it through much better again but still wished I had something to ease my mind. Thankfully, I recently discovered the Owlet Monitoring system. I can not wait to try this out with Apple. I know that in the 80's and 90's the baby monitoring systems that came out were not quite that great. But advancements on technology has been huge (did we ever think we would video chat?) and this monitor was a must have for me. I do believe with any technology used by humans there can be fails but for me it will be used as an added assurance. Nothing yet is the be-all end-all for preventing SIDS but anything that can help reduce risk and help me get a little more peace is worth it to me. 

Tips for Safe Sleep ::

ALWAYS Place baby on their back to sleep
Use a sleep sack or swaddle instead of bedding
Remove all stuffed toys and excess bedding from crib
Do not allow smoke near baby
Do not use bumpers on your crib
Keep the room cool (the Gro Egg is perfect to help you know right temperature)
Use a firm mattress and proper fitted sheets (I recommend Nook Sleep Mattresses)
Breastfeed as long as you can
When possible introduce a pacifier to baby
Do not rely on just one thing or device as SIDS is to be taken seriously and there is currently nothing that will prevent crib death guaranteed

About the Owlet ::

The wireless Smart Sock fits snug on your baby’s foot and monitors their heart rate and oxygen levels while they sleep. Owlet is designed to sound an alert if your child’s heart rate dips too low, rises too high, or if their oxygen level drops below a preset threshold. This alert strategy was determined by a team of pulse oximetry specialists, pediatricians, neonatologists and pulmonologists. Owlet is not a medical device. If your child has an irregular heart rate or irregular oxygen levels, you should not use Owlet as your primary monitoring system.

Disclosure :: This is under no way medical advice or a prevention for SIDS. All stories and opinions are those of Carmen the Modern Mom exclusively. Talk to your doctor for medical needs and requirements.


Thirty- five weeks pregnant...

Sunday, December 6, 2015

Thirty-five weeks! Wow! 

We are coming so close to the end of the bump and beginning of our life as a family of six. Time has been passing by quickly and that's so unusual for the end of a pregnancy. I know it has to do with the planning and setting up our house. Since we just moved and then I had moved to Vancouver to have Apple, I didn't get a chance to do anything or get settled into our place. It's been a lot of furniture ordering, deal searching, nagging Kurt on what colour he likes (not that he gets to pick but more about moral support. Lol), and figuring out baby gear still needed, all with perfect timing to arrive when Kurt is at our California house. Basically, many things to help keep me occupied while waiting for baby.

When I'm not online shopping, dealing with homeschool stuff for Middle or being a mom that's needed, I am dreaming about this baby girl. What will she look like and how different will it be for us to have a girl? I had a surreal moment in Pottery Barn the other day. I escaped out of the house alone to do a little browsing boutiques and pick up a few things I had wanted ahead. While buying extra crib sheets and it hit me hard, I was on the girl side. I don't know what it was because I've purchased so many girl clothes (although online mostly) but I had felt like it was a dream! My head was overwhelmed and I felt like crying this is true and real life. I might always get this feeling or life may become normal for us with three boys and a girl. But having overcome the odds in the pregnancy, paired with a girl arriving, it can still make my head spin. 

Now that little Apple is head down and my cerclage removal is booked it's not much longer. I have heard many stories of babies not coming on time after cerclage removal and others going into labour right after. I'm hoping for soon after the cerclage comes out but not the next day. The day after the removal will be the date my dad passed away. It was a bit of an overwhelming time that has some hard memories attached... I was away myself with my boys for Christmas in Cali and got called by my grandparents. Even though life wasn't perfect between my father and I, the fact he passed away in a fire was hard to take. I'd like to leave this behind me and let Apple have her own special date. A celebratory day of new life. In the end only God knows what's in the plan for us and I am going to trust everything is meant to be.

Notes ::

My cerclage comes out in under two weeks.

Food cravings are minimal as I'm sticking to a Paleo plan. (I did a whole30 in November)

Kingsley is obsessed with Apple kisses, tummy rubs and being a big brother.

She has a name that is not Apple. The initials are L.N.A.

Weight gain to date is twenty one pounds.


The perfect maternity photoshoot dress...

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

If you're looking for a great dress for a maternity photoshoot check out Rachel Pally. Her dresses flow beautifully over the bump and best of all are wearable after pregnancy! I love a good piece that can continue to work in your closet.

My dress is the Isa dress. A classic that has been seen on Kim and Kourtney Kardashian. I have been eyeing the Anya dress, Noemie dress and Kaftan dress for spring! As shown below. 

Stroller by Stokke Baby - Trailz Model
Diaper bag by Mia Bossi

The Kaftan (like that this is nursing friendly!)

The Anya dress

The Noemie dress (This can hide my post baby weight and is nursing friendly!)


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